Perhaps the moment before death is the only time we understand one another. Perhaps it's not possible to understand one another at all. Perhaps death itself is the great equalizer of life, taking away thoughts and feelings and opinions, and putting people together onto one equal plane. From birth onward, through the stages of maturation, persons, individually, travel their own paths to understanding life and how to live it. We come to understand things differently from others. Practically, spiritually, romantically... beliefs will always differ in the details. If we're lucky, we find a "kindred spirit" or several. Ultimately, it takes great effort to comprehend the thoughts and feelings of those around us, those who influence us and, most especially, those we don't particularly care to listen to at all. However, regardless of how much we come to believe it, we may not actually understand fully what another is intending to convey. One can say "I love you" and another can still interpret the meaning inaccurately.
History always repeats itself: conflict always erupts from differing opinions, peace always alleviates based on an attempt to understand, and breaks apart again when beliefs misalign. Perhaps the most that is achievable is to mature alongside one another, parallel to another's path and trajectory, equal and harmonious until those paths diverge again. Perhaps "understanding" is only a temporary solution to conflict. Perhaps "conflict" is a temporary necessity to peace and understanding.